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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.

  Fav 17 3993 1148

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity 

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  My booty call just moved 2 min from my house

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  This has pregnancy written all over it

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• 

  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.

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• (315): View more from New York

  I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone

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• (714): View more from California

  Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down

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