Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
