it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize