508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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