I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Randomize
