I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize