creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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