"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
