i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
