shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
foreskin is a definite game changer
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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