escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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