i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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