my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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