$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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