kristin has been a bad kristin
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
