i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Dick very happy bro
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
