How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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