I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
