Michael Bay diarrhea
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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