I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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