maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize