Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize