i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
