i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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