kristin has been a bad kristin
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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