I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
