he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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