I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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