I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
