Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
