dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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