She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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