We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
