you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize
