is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
this just has baby written all over it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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