so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
