and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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