thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize