i just wanna soil my oats bro
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize