I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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