Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I want to make a zoo with you.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
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She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
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Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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