he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
