I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Randomize
