I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
