This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
