so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
