Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
