kristin has been a bad kristin
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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