When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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