I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
