I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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