in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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